My second one. Am i officially an addict? So ashamed.
Do Black Africans have innate low self-esteem? No? Yes? Is it caused by Melanin?
Why is Africa still where it is? Why are we still so sheepishly reverent of the White man? Yes, they built the Ships and came here. But when they came why were we so overwhelmed? why didnt we say "ooooh... cool boat, but come this way and check out how we made these giant Odum trees grow from authentic bird crap... Organic baby!" or something.
It's not all of Africa, just the black bit. Because Egyptians were way ahead. Until recently. But i digress. Why is Sundiata the only guy from Black Africa to have made some sort of early world impact. Why didn't God pick Noah from Black Africa (Theology students, relax... i'm just making a point).
Why does Christo Asafo whatever his name is, think that by {re}inventing a car, he's achieved something worthy of attention? Why are we intrigued with something that Ford showed us in 1903 and Egyptians showed us even earlier? Wouldnt his time be better spent i dunno... making a fuel that can run my car on cocoa, shea butter and sand? Relevant? I'd say. Especially because he'd have done something that can make the white man wide-eyed. Instead of making TVs that turn on when you clap. How do you watch soccer or an action movie with that?
Why are we so eager to welcome and instantly believe that the White man is more experienced, more knowledgeable, more this and more that? Even at the expense of our own flesh and blood?Ghanaians are hospitable? yeah, to the White man.
Oh wait. perhaps it's because Jesus was white. And we're made in His image. Well, they are.
From the freaks, the ladies, the quiets, the crazies,
the ones we once loved who now have babies...
To the naggers, the playettes, the feminists, the divas,
the afrocentric fashionistas rocking Davivas...
From the old, the young, the fair, the dark,
To the tall, the short,
even the ones who play sport...
From the smart, the awesome, the downright cumbersome,
To the A cups, and the D’s, even those who're troublesome
From the ones who flaunt it and make us quake in the knees,
To those who stare and just say ugh, please...
From the made up, the natural, the woven on, the bald…
To the manicured, the pedicured,
the wont be bothered, cant be cured...
From the hard to get, the difficult to maintain,
the long life partners, the hard to explain...
To the bold, the strong,
the ones who keep this world moving along...
From all the women who inspire us
even to those who must always get their own way...
here's a note just to say,
Happy Women's day.
55 years ago, Ghana was a start-up and Nkrumah was the entrepreneur behind it. The Patrick Awuah of his day, if you will. He put toil and blood into it and made it flourish as much as possible. He was passionate about his business and he invested in it.
But now the founder has gone away and the business has lost it's soul, inspiration and drive. Now it's being managed by people who dont regard it as theirs and just want to milk it dry. The've formed unnecessary alliances, there's so much office politics - pun intended - internal power struggles, ass-kissing and unecessary pettiness. Innovation is stifled. Stagnant mediocre groupthink sets in.
New management has no empathy for the employees. Once in a while, the management does something that seems nice, and because the employees are so used to such crappy standards, even the littlest things seem... ahem... gargantuan.. But the saddest part is that these little things aren't perks, they're things that management is supposed to do! But, HR is not too effective, so there.
Management grows detached from the employees. The leaders eventually stop leading and focus on enriching themselves. The employees lose interest, arent as dedicated, and just coast and stop demanding. At least the paycheck is constant. And so it continues. Everybody just dey.
Nkrumah's generation was a much prouder generation of Africans. They believed in themselves. Even the way they spoke was different. Had a tinge of learnedness. They made things happen and became an active force to reckon with internationally. But now this entire generation seems to have low self-esteem. We've dropped the ball. Woefully. But all isn't completely lost. We're 55, but there's still time to grow up.
Those of you of a more mushy disposition are probably already aware of tomorrow's significance. Fine. Whatever. Some of us only just discovered today's date and it's implications an hour ago. So what to do? You could go out and try to find an open shop and buy something, but then the question is, what do you get? Roses? I've never quite understood the logic behind giving someone fresh flowers that will fade away, die and proceed to rot in a few hours, in significance of your affection.
Chocolate is an option... but then you have to get one of those expensive ones. You cant buy Kingsbite, unless your intention is to generate shock and annoyance. So... it has to be one of those foreign sounding ones from Geneva. But then, she'll gobble it all up, and then what? You'll have no evidence of your affection. And thus another dead end.
So now, your mind may drift to Brazilian hair - the gift that keeps on giving - however, unless you know any actual brazilians willing to shave on your account, why would anyone spend the equivalent of 48 bags of cement to prove a point? Bearing in mind that all that effort will evaporate by the 15th anyways.
So, solution? Feign ignorance. If she brings it up, go "nooo... that was today?!"
Or take the high road. Say to her "baby, i love how our relationship is so trancedental that we dont need fleeting materialistic elements to prove our afection for each other." At this point, she cant sulk, because on one hand it's a compliment - albeit a compliment that gets you off the hook - but one none the less. Bliss.
If all else fails, pick a good fight. Make it something that deserves at least a day's worth of sulking. Be careful though. They see these things coming especially during this dangerous period. So you'll have to find something natural, something she wont see coming. Like, walk in when she's watching TV and go "Baby, i thought we agreed you wouldnt watch TV3 news? Why do we keep having these issues! Why do you make this so difficult!" Then quickly storm out! Hopefully she wont recover till Friday. Be warned you have to do this before midnight tonight, otherwise she will catch on!
Goodluck!
Ok, forget public bathrooms. I have an even more fundamental issue with people who don't keep their personal bathrooms clean. Yes i'm back to this because it's the kind of thing that causes divorces. All that alleged love WILL die when you discover their horrendous bathroom manners. Why do you think there are couples walking around angry with each other for no officially recognized reason?
Have you ever walked into a bathroom in a respectble place - office, household, establishment, whatever - where seemingly respectable people are supposed to live and work... and then you walk into their disastrous bathroom and think, what the... wait a minute!!
Then you look at the people and now in the back of your head you're like, so you, upon your tie and big english... still? Yes, obviously i take this bathroom thing very personal, but i think i'm finally done. It's not rocket science. It's just basic courtesy, right?
"Do unto the bathroom what you would have other people do unto it before you get there". Or maybe it's not so simple.
I hate public bathrooms. And if you went to a local secondary school or you've seen some of the ones i have, you'd understand. Clean bathrooms should be part of the requirements for registering a business. They should be an aspect of customer service. But many places - even hotels - seem unable to grasp this concept, with shocking results.
And this extends to taps. Look, if you haven't switched to motion activated taps, we have a problem. Because unless they're disinfected every ten minutes, those taps are just bacterial infections waiting to kill you. Also, while we're on the subject, running water is a necessity. A note on the mirror that says "please the pipe is not flowing" is a call to be publicly flogged. So what happens in an emergency? Most people try to get home. But history has shown life can be cruel to even the manliest of men. With that in mind, here are some of the cleanest bathrooms people have suggested, just in case you ever have a code red. The Alisa Hotels - North Ridge.Fiesta Royal - Achimota Highway
Holiday Inn - Airport
Marvels - Dzorwulu
Golden Tulip, Kumasi (the Accra one is meh)
If you can get to one of these, you should be fine. If not, may the force be with you.
Have you been stuck in this demonic traffic lately? God forbid without the luxury of an air-conditioned machine? At midday? Near Novotel? It's a life-changing experience. I'd always attributed it to people coming into Accra from other regions, but my friend pointed out that there aren't many cars with outside-Accra registration plates around. So what's really going on?
Stupidity.
Lemme explain. Yesterday after being stuck in standstill traffic for 20 minutes, we finally get a long stretch of clear road. But the guy in front of me is still crawling. When I finally overtake him, I slow down to give him compliments of the season but realize there's no one in the driver's seat. The driver was sitting in the passenger's seat. It was a right-hand drive car. Of course. My mistake. The green number plates should have been my clue. And here he was, obviously confused, but still freely driving on the democratic and hospitable Ghanaian roads.
That car came into the country thru our own borders. If the people whose salaries your tax money pays, let a right-hand drive car into a left-hand drive country designed with left-hand roads and driving regulations, then so be it.By 9am today, they'd blocked the main Oxford street road just after Frankie's because of Kojo Antwi. Forgetting that even on a normal day, Osu is hell to navigate. Also forgetting that yesterday, even when they hadn't blocked the road, the traffic to get into Osu stretched beyond Morning Star. But what's traffic compared to a show by the maestro?
People form three lanes on a one lane road. Obviously the idiots in the correct lane are not in as much of a hurry as their esteemed colleagues. Again, the idiots forget that at a point they will have to rejoin the main road.
Then other people turn on their hazard lights and decide that since they are even more important than the rest of us, they will break the rest of the laws that haven't already been broken.Now here come the police, whizzing by with hazard lights and sirenes, completely ignoring the chaos. Obviously they have more important things to do. But wouldn't this be the best place to make some "lucrative" arrests? If I was a policeman I'd be on that Polo-Club road every day. Pulling twats over and putting my kids thru school. But no. So the chaos remains and grows exponentially.
Stupidity. With no solution in sight.
But, found out about something that's been started to help warn people about traffic this season. I don't see why we can't test it out and keep it going thru out next year. So if you have any traffic news, please put it on Twitter and add the hashtag GHTrafficWatch.
Im staying home today. But if you choose to venture out, remember the hashtag. Ignore the stupid. Keep your mind calm. And let me know how it goes.
This is for Entrepreneurs - heroes - the ones who said screw it and stepped out on their own. Takes nuts and guts. But mostly immense passion and a desire to make a mark. My Christmas gift to you is a bit of inspiration to take your own first steps as a new year dawns. To spur you on, here's a list of the top ten entrepreneurs of the year. Brace yourself. Some of them are your little sister's age. http://www.businessmba.org/top-entrepreneurs/
And here's a quick salut to...
Exclusive preview. This ad premiered this evening in South Africa.
Salute to the creative team (i hear it's TBWA/Hunt/Lascaris. i need to verify) and hats off to the client for signing off on it. i feel it has major metal potential. Stay tuned.
Happy Thankgiving guys!
Digital Disciple, Advertising Geek, Car freak, Amateur Entrepreneur, Thinker, Writer, soon-to-be TEDster. (I also play for Team Publicis)
